Monday, January 18, 2010

.....ssshhhh...no one knows......


you know why I haven't posted?

Because 1) I am busy,
and 2) it's hard to post to this blog WHEN NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT IT!!! It's a SECRET....

Since I'm all about the honesty of dealing with my fat ass, I gotta say: I'm not being honest with my husband about this blog.

I want to keep it secret for now, because I really wanna share. Share some stuff that's REALLY hard for me to talk about. I don't have close girlfriends who I can dish the dirt with. I don't have sisters that I like (I have sisters but they're BAD people...)

I haven't been so good lately. Been eating some crappy food (man, I love chinese food...). Not working out every day like I should. I've been to the gym, but not every single day. I WANT to go there. I'm just swamped with life...I'm a Mom, and I have a job. And occasionally I have to sleep.

I don't have my weight to share with you. Mainly because it's THAT week. You know THAT WEEK that being a girl sucks. I have cramps that would kill a grown man. My husband was so grateful to go to the office today :) All I can think is that I want to go get on the treadmill and walk through the pain.

I've been looking at other bloggers, other websites. I like this one best :

Badass Fitness

That woman inspires me. I want that so bad that I actually threw away all the candy in my house today. ALL OF IT. Even that bag of mini Reese's PB cups that I adore...I had a long talk with myself today, while naked in the mirror, and I yelled at myself, "do you want it?" And through tears, I heard myself quietly say "yes."

So I'm in it. It's on, baby. I wanna be a BadAss, too.

Tomorrow, I will share a photo of my FatAss. I don't want to. But I will.
What I will not do is tell anyone about this blog yet. It's my secret weapon. Instead of having a Happy Place (where there is usually a Cold Stone Creamery Like It Size with extra Oreos...), I'm going to have a Secret Place, where honesty and accountability rule.

But let's just keep it between us, eh?

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