Wednesday, January 20, 2010

giving in...

I went and busted my ass at the gym.
I can tell my body is adjusting to this level of working out.
I am not wincing as much, nor gasping, huffing and puffing as long :)

then I came home and had a HUGE glass of water, also known as a trough. And a smallish bowl of Kettle Chips. I love those things. It's like sex in a bowl. THIS WEEK, I need salt. And I need some crunch.

The difference this time? I am owning this bowl. I KNOW I'll see my numbers go up tomorrow because of it, but I am consciously choosing to eat this, instead of mindlessly sticking something in my mouth because I am bored. Or lonely (my husband works hellish hours). Or frustrated (do I really have to yell at the kids again?)

I own this bowl of chips. I chose it. And I'll have to answers for it tomorrow when I see my trainer at the gym. He complimented my frequent and consistent gym attendance this week. It's nice to be complimented for my hard work.

You see how I glossed right over the fact that I have a trainer? Now before you go thinking, "Oh she's spoiled and has a personal trainer." this guy is brutal. No is not in his vocabulary. I made the mistake once of telling him that my workouts were getting easier. BIG mistake...All in all, he's fair. I have taken him and what he does for granted. Today when I saw him, I had a list of questions for him. He was surprised and started laughing.....I was all defensive and ready to slap him (hormones...what can I say?) and he merely said, "Nice to see you're ready to start working...." (he's been my trainer2x weekly for 6 months....) I get the feeling I'm going to get a whole new level of torture tomorrow.

That's OK. I'm going to own that, too.

(An aside: you see those abs in that photo that I used. I want those abs. I admit it. I wanna look sleek. Maybe not THAT tight, but I don't want the rolls I have now......I really should photograph my own abs and own that, but I'm building up to that.....)

---damn, the chips are gone......

edited to add: OH.MY.GOSH.....I am doomed. Did you guys see this?

This woman, who I think is vile, had 8 BABIES and looks like this. I've had 2 and I don't look like that.

All of a sudden, I'm not having a good day.

And regretting those chips even more.....

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